17
May
10

Way It All Ends


    Late one night I was reading a book
    alone with myself in my bed
    when my daddy came peeking his head through my door
    saying Let's us go playing instead
    He ran a bubble bath helped me out of my clothes
    fussed Don't be so camera shy
    My mom and my sisters were out somewhere else
    at the time I didn't know yet why
    I'm supposed to learn things out the hardest way
    that's what nature's choice intends
    That's as much of it as I remember for now
    and I forget the way it all ends

    We moved around too much to pin down a house
    a year at most in any one school
    never learned what might make anything keep very long
    what could carry was what fit our rule
    I got caught in trouble once maybe twice
    for various petty crimes
    and also for trying to burn our place down
    almost did so too many times
    One can't always grow up innocent
    take the one hand the other extends
    That's as much of it as I remember for now
    and I forget the way it all ends

    By the age of fourteen I gave up pretending
    so moved my ass out to the street
    I confess there were days I even quit that
    but I'll never admit I was beat
    You learn how little it takes to get by
    when you find yourself happy with less
    A girl hasn't truly hit the floor hard
    as long as she still can undress
    That and some whiskey are all the girl needs
    to get her a room full of friends
    That's as much of it as I remember for now
    and I forget the way it all ends

    That's not what I told my doctors when asked
    for some background dirt good for their files
    There's really no reason to be how I am
    since my childhood was sunshiny smiles
    I don't know why I got put in there anyway
    I never did nobody harm
    and who cares if some skinny bitch puking her crack's
    got some blood oozing out of each arm
    I was that close to missing this song's next verse
    and still might, we'll find that depends
    That's as much of it as I remember for now
    and I forget the way it all ends

    The roomie they gave me was worse than insane
    I never knew what to expect
    Call it whatever you think it should be
    except love (which would be most correct)
    I won't go around filling the holes she left open
    Maggie can do so herself
    I'm just happy for what she left in my care
    though she meant it for somebody else
    I'm not really one with a right to complain but
    love sure doesn't earn what life spends
    That's as much of it as I remember for now
    and I forget the way it all ends

    She said from the start she was fixing to leave
    every morning — I'm fixing to leave here, kid —
    but then always made up excuses against
    so I wasn't there when she did
    though I know the way she expects to be found
    I'd prefer that she find me here first
    so that's why I came back and that's what I'm doing
    Feel free to assume worse than worst
    That's her, wasn't it? saying I might come with her
    in the way her last note always bends
    That's as much of it as I remember for now
    and I forget the way it all ends

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1 Response to “Way It All Ends”


  1. 2010.05.17 at 10:09 pm

    The poem drains my emotions and fills my heart with such a sad mood…it carves its images into my mind…and provokes so much thought…it is a strong poem…one that touched my heart.


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formal attire

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